Day 9

Posted August 15, 2008
Filed under: Journal |

7 July 2008

Meals
Breakfast: Apple, prunes, instant pasta, fibre biscuits
Lunch: Rice with beef and veggies
Dinner: Rice with potatoes and veggies, apple, prunes

Expenses
$78 Groceries
$10 Music print pencil box (souvenir)
Total: $88 (RM37)

Pages: 1 2 3

5 comments so far

  1. lovelyloey on August 15, 2008

    *Hugs*
    I don’t know what that feels like, and I am sad that none of us were there to help you get through it. :(

  2. onemonthinmacau on August 15, 2008

    thank you :) it was my fault, i should’ve blogged about it instead of keeping it to myself. but i felt so ashamed at that time because it felt like a failing.

  3. crazyasuka on August 16, 2008

    Having thoughts of suicide… happen when we feel trapped, and all the ways out seem to be the same as horrible. There’s nothing that counteracts the overwhelming feelings of hopelessnes and anxiety, so they gain strenght, and only one thing seems to be attractive enough. Ending it.

    Suicidal ideation is more common than you think, and most people who think about it do not commit suicide. Eventually, they find something that counteracts the feelings. Even a good night of sleep helps to dissipate the feelings of being trapped and with no way out.

    Some people do of course, go to higher levels so it’s not to be taken lightly either.

    *hugs* You were all alone. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Having no one to turn to in times of crisis is awful no matter how strong you think you are.

  4. onemonthinmacau on August 16, 2008

    my counteract is my fear of the unknown after death, haha. it was a bit of a childish tendency for me, like hmph, i’ll die now and let them be haunted by their guilt forever!

    but i’ve not thought about suicide for a long long time (because of that fear), so it was really quite bad.

    the story isn’t over yet, though!

  5. crazyasuka on August 16, 2008

    I can’t wait to read what happens next.


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